Ex-Big Brother Star Rises Again!

The British public was shocked this morning to find that ex-big brother contestant Jade Goody had briefly risen from the dead! This surprise comes nearly three weeks after her sad death. On 22nd March 2008, Jade sadly succumbed to the cervical cancer that she had developed. This provoked a huge reaction from the general public, with many followers (pussies) looking up to her and calling her “brave”, and a large amount of cunts, clearly so inconvenienced by her media appearances, that they wanted her to die as soon as possible.












“I saw that Jade’s tomb was empty… so I got upset, you see - I thought Shilpa Shetty had stolen the body.” one witness said. “I met her in the garden, and I didn’t recognise her. I swear to god, I thought from the mumbling that she was a random tramp at first! My second thought was zombie, but soon I realised it was Jade!”

Jade spent a short time with her family, before ascending to her resting place. Her family claim that she is not the messiah, nor is she a naughty boy, but she deserved respect as much as anyone else who has had cancer, regardless of her past actions.



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